I have a suggestion.

If you know any women in tech that you think you could ask about this, ask them. If you know any African-Americans or Latinos in tech, ask them. You may learn things that you don't know about right now. And if you don't know any non-white males that you would feel comfortable asking in order to expand your horizons... well, that's evidence of a problem, right?

You find it offensive that there are claims of sexism. I find it offensive that there is actual sexism. I don't know a female tech professional who hasn't been subjected to discomfort, doubt, or harassment. Especially if they're pretty - every pretty woman I know in tech has faced assumptions that she isn't technical, because she's a woman.

No one is going to ruin your career because you made a careless sexist remark (especially if you acknowledge that it was actually sexist afterward). Hell, they can't ruin your career, not in an industry with negative unemployment, not unless you crossed the line into physical assault. Which, by the way, many males techies have gotten away with doing to their female colleagues.

People who disagree with the "narrative" of equality aren't heretics. They're assholes.

> No one is going to ruin your career because you made a careless sexist remark

unless it was a dongle joke at a tech conference.

Educate yourself on what happened. Did you know that the woman who reported the dongle joke was fired from her job because she reported it? And that she received actual threats for it?

http://techcrunch.com/2013/03/21/a-dongle-joke-that-spiraled...

I don't know who the anonymous joker was (who got fired, and then publicly apologized for his inappropriate joke), but I'm fairly certain he would have found another job pretty easily. "Career ruined" is still not correct language for this situation.

There are lots of places you can speak your mind anonymously and say whatever you like about whoever you like. Of course, the downside of posting anonymously is if you express some socially unpopular opinion people will just dismiss it as bigotry, when presumably you'd like to have that opinion taken more seriously. But if you attach your name to it, and that name is invested with social credibility for whatever reason, then one of two things can happen. It might be more persuasive other others because of who you are; or if enough people consider your opinion socially toxic, your overall credibility may take a hit.

Well, too damn bad. We live in an increasingly densely populated world and communicate through increasingly persistent channels, such that it's almost as easy to permanently record your whimsical opinion on any subject on the internet as it is to mumble it under your breath in a moment of transitory annoyance. That density and persistence combine to amplify the power of ideas significantly, whether those ideas are entrepreneurial, artistic, political or whatever. If too many people find your opinions hurtful or offensive, then in the aggregate they'll isolate you socially on the basis that your positive contributions, however good they may be, are not sufficiently interesting to offset the negative feelings your opinions engender. You're not so special that your positive contributions can't possibly be replicated by anyone else, and so people will prefer to wait for someone who is equally productive but more pleasant to be around.

In short, you can say whatever you like without regard for its effect on others, or you can maintain and improve your social standing, but society is not obliged to help you do both at the same time.

Of course, there's an interest grou for everything on the internet, so no matter how extreme or controversial your opinions are, you can likely find a community of people where those opinions will be validated, celebrated, perhaps even commercially viable, even as they are rejected or vilified by society at large. You will have to decide what sort of social connectivity you desire and deal with the limitations of that choice on your output, your popularity, and so on.

This was the intent behind Political Correctness - a term cribbed from the Soviet Union's ideology and popularized in the United States at the University of Wisconsin, Madison. It's an intentional tool of social control by corrupt people who want to enforce a worldview on others.

Ther is no such thing as it "going too far". It shouldn't exist at all.

I feel the same way you do, especially the part about white males being attacked most of the time. And i'm not even white.

"I don't want to be politically correct. But it looks like they only way to survive is to be that."

It is the only way to survive. If you say the wrong thing, even if you aren't attacking anyone, you could have your career or life ruined.

Just look at the ex-Mozilla CEO for a good example of this. He donated a small amount of money in a cause he believe in, but because it didn't go along with the community narrative, he was bullied online until he was forced to resign.

If it had been the reverse and he donated to a pro gay marriage fund and the company was extremely religious, the same community would be on the side of the CEO. This is what tells you it's all about politics and has nothing to do with what people tell you (freedom, etc).

I just don't understand why we can't just live and let live.

In the end, it means that people like me that ordinarily just want to live and let live now have to resort to under-handed tactics (like getting people fired and ruining the lives of people) to make the world right.

Yeah, must suck to have your life ruined and be denied opportunities based on your actions rather than your gender, race, or orientation like all us non-white non-straight non-males have to deal with. "Why can't I just be allowed to be terrible to other people without fear of criticism?!?"