While I agree with you here, but if you're doing a 9 hour work day with an hour on the shoulders for your commute, then you're looking at 19 hours dedicated to work alone.

Say, 30 minutes for dinner (if you're not the one cooking), 15 minutes for shower/grooming, 30 minutes for exercise plus whatever time it takes to get ready and cool down...so...an hour? If you're rolling solo, that probably rounds out your daily commitments. With kid(s) and a partner, you're down to 3 hours in which to help/bond with kids, spend time with your partner, plus whatever travel/wind up/wind down time those things take. Maybe 30 minutes a day you could really commit to these things?

I dunno, there are a lot of variables, but I find that prescriptive articles like these essentially dump the demands for your <insert here> project upon the shoulders of your family. If you want to make it really uncomfortable, consider the demographics of people here and in the software industry at a whole. Now it's just more of men offloading the work of family, house and home, etc. on the women in order for them to get their own projects done.

Sounds great, but don't expect much.

You’re right, with a full time job you have to sacrifice something, especially if you have kids. I found some balance by working from home so I get to spend a lot of time with my kid, though I still frequently work late into the night - often till 1 am. My goal is to make enough on the side gig to quit the day job so I can dedicate 100% of my time to my projects. I have a feeling it won't be easy but I gotta plow ahead, there is no other choice.

I have to try this. But how does it work out for you when you "have to" be up late, e.g. at social activities? I imagine yawning my way through a late dinner, falling asleep at the cinema.

Realistically, that sort of thing suffers. My wife keeps an early schedule and anything past 7 or 8 is iffy. She can usually do it, but there's a non trivial chance that she'll be too tired to function properly.

This is spot on and have started this two weeks ago. I get up at 5am and start work at 9am. Solid productivity time with no little ones.

Yeah, sadly 5am is when my kids like to wake up :(

That early time for me is to focus on my body with exercise. A lot of time in this industry we forget about the body because our mind pays the bills. It's not sustainable.

I started doing this a month ago and it's been working well for me.

I'd always end up dozing off if I tried to get anything done after the kids went to bed. Now it's asleep by 8:30PM and up at 4:30-5AM for a few hours of personal work time.

I have to ask - where is in that schedule the time to bond with your partner, or to do household chores?

Bonding time with the wife is after the kids go to bed. We both enjoy vegging out on the couch or in bed watching TV together. Chores are done mostly on weekends.

I do the same, but sleep at 4am and wake up at 12 (I work remotely and that's when I start work). Late night is the best time to be creative, for me, since there's absolutely nobody to distract you.

Love this approach and points, thanks. I'm fully deep into the am routine, and at 8am when they wake up I'm a piece of meat that barely walks.

Who looks after your kids in the morning while you are awake and the kids are awake?

Seems you must have an amenable partner?

They love to sleep. We need about 1 hour break in the morning to help them prepare for school. My partner teached me to wake up early.

Depends on how old they are. At 4+ they're fine to be on their own a bit with you near by.